psychology on this one...ideas to find the magic key

hi guys. yesterday i revisited a lady in foreclosure. much like the first time i was greeted with “get the ef off my property. you’re a piece of sh** etc etc.” it’s tough for me to even get a word in and she screams this from the living room w/out ever answering the door. i think this lady is mentally ill or thinks im from the mortgage company (or both).

i’ve sent letters to her before but i’m sure she’s getting tons of them so who knows if she’s read them.

at any rate, i was posting here to see if you guys could recommend some out of the box suggestions which i can use to get around this ladies barrier. i believe she has some soft spot which i can find and take it from there.

you guys have any suggestions of how i can approach this? my guess is i’m going to have to do something off the wall to make some progress on this one.

i’d love to hear any info.


ps - before anyone asks

  1. i’m pursuing this deal because i believe i can find a way around this barrier because just like my first deal i was told to go ef myself and a month later this same person was calling me a prince.
  2. there’s also tons of equity (so yes it’s worth the risk)

Personally, I’d take the hint and move on. Taking someone’s house that you think might be mentally ill or under extreme stress is a lawsuit in the making.

Is that the only way you can find deals in your area? If I had to resort to that nonsense to find deals, I’l find another business.


Hi Mike,

It’s funny, I received the same information on my first deal. If I moved on, I wouldn’t have landed it. I sorta feel the same way about this one. I just get the feeling that this is a huge “front” and she desperately needs help. I think that I can make a strong connection and have a big impact if I can just seperate myself from who I’m perceived to be.

Of course this isn’t the only way to find deals, but doorknocking seems to give the best results. I don’t have to purchase her home, if I can get her to keep her home I will.

I hope that clarifies things. I don’t want to get into a huge debate as to why I should or shouldn’t pursue this deal, but rather some ideas on a strategy that “might just work”. I’m open for anything.


This is going to sound insane.

Make a mortgage payment for her.

It’s one payment your gambling here. If there is a ton of equity the payment is probably a joke.

Then after the payment is made send her certified mail receipt for that mortgage payment. She’ll have to sign for it. Make sure that receipt has a SHORT letter attached stating who you are and why you made the payment. KEEP IT SHORT. All you want is an invitation to TALK to her.

I bought THE last available lot on a lake from an old lady who owned it for 40 years. EVERYONE had asked her to sell it, she was pleasant, but told everyyone she’d NEVER let it go. I used to stop by and talk to her every once in a while. One day she said her furnace had died and her quarterly taxes were due next month and it always goes that way, ect. I paid that quarters taxes for her and sent the receipt. It wasn’t much $600.

Guess who owns that lot now. She almost fell over she said. No one had ever helped her like that before.

Best $600 I ever spent.

Worth a try but not in every situation.

will the bank accept just one mort payment? i was under the impression that you have to pay what is owed in arrears as well.

also, in order to find out her monthly payments, don’t i need an authorizaion to release form to speak to the mortgage company to obtain this info? at any rate, i’d be lucky if it was only $600.

yes the idea sounds a little crazy, but this is the kinda stuff i’m looking for ;]

much appreicated for your input

Your right on all counts. You will need to speak to someone at the bank. She will definitely owe more than one payment. What your trying to do is buy yourself some time. I would make a few calls, the mortage should be listed at town hall. Tell them your just trying to help her out. Banks DO NOT want these homes, if they think your in a postion to help her out they will be more than happy to take your money. You may have to slip and slide a little hear, but your intentions ARE to delay that foreclosure. There is nothing illegal about that.

Mike is right, there are a LOT easier ways to get deals than this.

that is true, but the harder the deal the better the proft ;]

i look at it this way. if i can make a connection with this lady, i can guarantee nobody else will make it past 2 seconds with her. its an exciting challenge. i will be honest, there was a few seconds of silence between the screaming and i thought i was going to get a bullet in the skull through a window. the fun of real estate ;]

next (and last) time i go back im going to be prepared and sharp minded to hopefully make some sort of progress. should be exciting to say the least.

I agree with property manager There are other ways to find deals instead of trying to take advantage of someone. That is why people who go the preforclosure route are looked at as scam artists. Then everyone second guesses all realestate investing. There are ways to make money in rei and yes we do look for properties below market value but we make our offer and if they dont like it we move on to the next one. trying to take advantage of someone will get you nowhere in this life or the next . ever hear of CARMA?

who mentioned taking advantage of someone? these are never my intentions. im not trying to pull a fast one here. i’m trying to help.

right. that’s how i’m different and how i will succeed in this business. i’ll keep striving to find a way which works. furthermore, i don’t just “make offers”, i aim to make an impact in the homeowners life.

no i haven’t, but i have heard of Karma


I didn’t get the sense that you were trying to take advantage of ANYONE with your post.

Your attitude concerning a “challenge” will serve you very well in your real estate investing. I LOVE a challenge so I know right where your coming from with this lady. These deals can be blockbusters if you can get them. However, i will agree with the other posts, don’t waste too much time and energy on her. Some of these people are just NUTS, they would rather lose the house than make some money and get on with their lives.

Another Idea… Next time you go there, once the screaming ends, YELL “Do you realize you could walk away from this with a pile of money?
I’m not here to steal your house, Give me a friggin’ second and maybe you make some money, or F@ck it, let the bank take it!”

Sometimes if people are screaming and yelling, dropping the f bombs, the best thing you can do is GIVE IT RIGHT BACK. That’s how some people actually communicate. I see it everyday. (construction) Most guy’s who have the sac to show up at her house wither away when see starts screaming. (I bet you did the first time) Scream right back! It’ll get her attention. Now this will sound stupid, do it tactfully. Yea, I know, I can hear the responses already. I think you know what I mean.

Good luck and keep us informed.


I know you weren’t saying that…I was addressing Johnnyg.

I do agree about wasting too much time. The total time invested has been minute. The home is located one block from wholefoods so it’s part of my weekly errands.

Having that said, back to the initial post. I’d love to hear some more recommendations which are off the wall and might be that “magical key”.


put a horses head in her bed. Works every time. :smile

If she’s truly mentally ill, doing a deal with her could easily lead to a lawsuit. And part 2: If she’s mentally ill, it’s entirely possible that she’s not the person you should be talking to.

i know it could. but sub2’s can also lead to lawsuits. i’ll cross that bridge once i come to it.

i’m actually surprised i didn’t hit it off with her yet, i’ve been told im a little nutty as well :biggrin

all the points mentioned are noted and not overlooked, however i want to keep to the scope of the thread.


your last post actually had me thinking why i didn’t do something similar to what you said. definitely something to keep in mind for next visit.



Dont be rediculous. You are going to put up with this crazy lady sceaming and yelling just so you could help her. Get freakin real. You said in your first post there is tons of equity so dont even go there about helping her. I am all for a win win situation but it just sounds to me like you want to take advantage. move on she dosent want your “help” . And karma, spelled either way cames back around so heads up.


I don’t know why you’re criticizing him so hard. I don’t know about anyone else but I’m in RE to MAKE MONEY, sure if I can help someone along the way that’s icing on the cake. Of course he is taking advantage of the situation, who wouldn’t? There is a lot of equity in this house and if bought, could be a VERY good deal. Although I would move on and find another deal, props to Ryan for being unique and different than any other investor.

I don’t see anything wrong about this thread AT ALL.



Let’s not be ridiculous here. This woman’s credit is already ruined. As Adam said, I have absolutely no problem with someone buying her house and making money, but this is NOT “helping” or “having an impact on her life”. That’s ridiculous. Whatever happens, her credit is trashed already. Additionally, she may get more money if this property goes to auction. I’m sure that you realize that the owner gets any money in excess of what the bank is owed. So, depending on what you’re offering, she might very well do better if it goes to auction.

This is not about a win-win. This is about you taking her equity and giving her little or nothing in return. Again, I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with that, only that you should at least be honest with yourself.

What I do have a problem with is your tactics. You are harrassing this woman. She is obviously already in pain and you are making things worse - NOT HELPING! You have been told to get off her property and yet you plan to go back. While I normally agree with Pete, I think his idea to Yell and Curse at this woman is one of the dumbest things I have ever heard. You’ll be lucky if you don’t get shot and I would say you deserve it if you do. Intentionally trespassing and harrassing someone in pain is just cruel and I have absolutely no respect for that. You are playing games and someone else is paying the price. Shameful if you ask me.



so you’re telling me that because there’s tons of equity that i should not help her? better yet, your assuming that i’m claiming i want to help her but it’s only a cover up right? i guess i didn’t help the last two homeowners who i helped stay in their home. did i mention they both had tons of equity. did i mention i did this at no charge? i really should stop these horrible things.


you’re making too many assumptions. i never said i was going to buy her house outright. i said i wanted to help her. how can i do so? i have no idea until i understand her situation. as i stated before i don’t just throw money at homeowners, i try to find out the problems which caused them to enter foreclosure in the first place and then try to provide solutions for each. if i could put somebody up in an apartment, home (whatever) for 6 months free, it will most likely have more of an impact then just giving them an extra 6 or 7 thousand dollars extra. that’s just the tip of the ice berg but i believe my point is made.

now i agree somewhat with your last statement. i don’t feel great about going back to give this another attempt. i’m choosing to do so, because i did a poor job of representing myself. she thinks im somebody i’m not. i’m hoping to clear this up if i can do work things correctly and luck is on my side. i believe pete was more or less saying that i shouldnt have been so shy when she acted the way she did. if i acted a little more bold, it would have shown and perhaps her reaction would have been different.

i just missed what you wrote: “This is about you taking her equity and giving her little or nothing in return. Again, I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with that, only that you should at least be honest with yourself.”

another assumption which you are sadly wrong. furthermore i DO believe there is somethign wrong with taking someones equity w/out giving anything in return.


Props to you propertymanager for showing you can make money in rei and have ethics.Ryan this is the last I will address this because it is becoming a waste of time. You let the last two people stay in their house? Cant understand what that is all about at all. You could put me up in an apartment for 6 mths free also. Just make it in sunny L.A.You want to help people, become a big brother or do habbitat for humanity or something. Dont use rei as your cover for praying on people at their lowest point.

You all are funny :biggrin
I believe everyone here would jump at the chance to obtain/buy a house that has a bunch of equity and get away with giving the homeowner little to no money.

We as investors are in the business of obtaining property for as little as possible. That is why Carlton Sheets makes so much off of his courses. The object of this game is to make as much as possible and spend as little as possible. Let’s keep it real as the younger generation would say.