Sending your children to SCHOOL.......The SOFT SELL!!!!

I have a young son that I hope can learn from some of the lessons I’ve paid for with blood, sweat and MONEY. The hope is that IF…and that’s a BIG IF…IF I can do this the right way, he just ABSORBS IT instead of having it crammed down his throat…Hopefully, it simply gives him some OPTIONS and SECURITY in life. That’s it…That’s the payoff…Not the next billionaire real estate tycoon…Just OPTIONS!!

I’ve known people that had very successful businesses but failed to pass this GIFT onto their kids…First off, let me say that kids will have their own desires, dreams, and hopes, and NOTHING should move them from following those plans!! This isn’t about PUSHING your kids into something they don’t want to do…It’s about GUIDING them so the CHOICE is THEIRS.

I knew a VERY SUCCESSFUL contractor that owned a multi million dollar paving business…He was an incredible HARD ASS to his kids…They got up on weekends at 5am and washed and waxed his trucks, THEN went out and worked a 10 hour day…and he SCREAMED at them the entire day…These were KIDS…10, 12, years old…Now I work hard, so the thought of teaching a kid the value of hard work is something I agree with 100%…But this guy made his kids HATE his business…NOT ONE of them followed him into it…THEY HATED EVERYTHING about it. I personally know these kids and have asked them WHY they didn’t take over a ready made multi million dollar business???

Their answer???

My father made me HATE that work…

I thought that was very interesting…

In contrast…I knew a very successful real estate investor with young kids about the same age…He took a completely different approach…

He would come home at night and during dinner, would ask his son’s WHAT THEY WOULD DO in certain negotiations he was involved with.
He made it INTERESTING for the kids…He’d tell them that he took their advice on this, or on that, and told them how well it worked out…Obviously these kids got interested in this business as they became more and more involved in their fathers work. That lead to them picking out things for rehabs (from a few carefully selected choices) and further peaked their interest…eventually they were given small projects to manage.

I’m trying the same thing with my son…I take him with me when I go to look at properties…I ask him to check out comps for the area online…Ask HIM what he thinks a good OFFER might be…I also TELL him of various ways in which I have convinced people to accept my offers…and also ask HIM if he can think of any ideas…He’s come up with some great ones.

Bottom line…He’s INTERESTED and He’s LEARNING!!!

Case in point…

My wife and I were in tears the other night…

I get a phone call on a home a seller wants out of…I get the info and make an appointment to see it…When I hang up the phone my wife asks where the house is and what they want for the property…I tell her where and what the seller wants for it (which was DIRT) and from the other room, we hear my son yell out…

THAT’s A STEAL DAD!!! When are we going to look at it!!!

The funny part??? It WAS a STEAL…and at 10 years old…HE KNEW THAT!!!

The SOFT SELL PEOPLE…That’s where it’s at…The SOFT SELL!!!

Nice to see you back Jake, seems like youve been gone for a while… :beer

Very good post. I agree 100%. When things are funner, you get interested.

What got me interested in Real Estate Investing compared to what my dad does? My dads friend (a big investor) MADE IT INTERESTING to me when I was about 14-15 years old. He talked to me about how its fun to deals in different ways and such… hell, he even showed me and told me to start posting (although ive gravitated to only posting on Random Ramblings :smiley: )

But bottom line, your 100% correct Jake. With your son, you could make it seem like total backbreaking work, not interesting at all, and turn your son off from investing. Hopefully one day when I have kids, and im successful, I can teach my lessons to them at a younger age than I learned things. Ide LOVE to know what I know at 19 at the age of even 17! (Pointless political arguements, remember those days?)


Thanks man, I’ve been CRAZY busy the last month or so…

Here’s one thing I’ve learned in this business…The deals in real estate all come in at the SAME TIME…I have NEVER been able to figure this out…It’s like a giant SWITCH gets thrown somewhere and people just start calling ALL AT THE SAME TIME!!!

THIS WEEK…I have 4 closings…F O U R…Where “I” am the SELLER!!! Sounds great right??? (and believe me, I’m NOT complaining) but that means 4 smoke detector inspections in 4 different cities, 4 appointments to meet those inspectors so they can PUSH A BUTTON on a new smoke detector and hand you a paper for the closing…It’s 4 separate BANKS asking for 10 different little BS things that alone mean nothing…But together mean a LOT of running around before those closings take place. It’s 4 separate attorneys asking for 4 separate closing times on 3 different days…

I’ve been straight out for the last month…and once this is over it’ll be DEAD for a month…That’s the way this business is…You’re bombed one week and LOOKING for things to do the next month…BUT…You console yourself by looking over your BANK STATEMENTS!!! :beer

I’m right there with you Hoosier…

If I knew THEN, what I know NOW??? Forget about it!


You’re not depending on the closings being at the time they told you,are you?LOL!!Here you’re lucky if they are even right on the day they said to close.

I’m totally with you on wanting to instill values with your kid for the longhaul.I have seen the same thing you mentioned with friends of mine.It confused me on their decision to not want the turnkey business.But I understand why now.

We want our kids to learn how to respect money and at the same time not scare them away from our business.At the same time you can’t just hand them the machine and say takeover.That’s like giving your kid a supercar when they get their license.It sounds like you have a good thing going with your son.Keep up the great work.

Good to hear you’re rockin.We were steady until the never ending oil gusher.EVERYTHING is at a solid standstill.My wife’s realtor office has about 120 agents.They have a board with sales on it,listings and closings.She said there was 4 on it yesterday since last monday.It sux to be doing everything right and something totally out of your control screw it up.We’re praying for a miracle.

Just a heads up. That kid who loves the business right now will probably rebel when he is a teen.

Don’t press the issue. He’ll grow through it and come back to the business, because it is one he knows. Or else, you’ve already given him the background to be successful in any business that appeals to him.

My mom use to tell me not to grow up with a boss, I wouldn’t like it. I didn’t listen. She didn’t press the issue when I started flying lessons, or college. Well now 6 years into my airline gig, she was right. I am a horrible employee (at least I know it!) but I am great on my own. But you couldn’t have told that to me 10 or 5 years ago.

Excellent points…

Sellnbama…Man you NAILED!!! Those closings??? Those dates for this week???..EVERYONE of them have been moved at least TWICE over the last month…Now of coarse they’ll all close within a DAY of each other.

Tater…I’ll make sure to remember what you said. I bet you end up being spot on!

Thanks for the comments. :beer :beer

FDjake, that is awesome.

Someday I would love to pass my business off to my son as well and teach him what Dad knows.

Now if I can only teach him to get out of the way of the TV, (he’s only three now).

Both of my parents are into real estate, but I’m simply not cut to it. I like science and web development more, and none of us their children seems to be following their path. But we are grateful that their profession paid for our schooling so we were able to pursue now our own dreams.

Re: Sending your children to SCHOOL…The SOFT SELL!!!

for the six year old mindset…

I like the counting out…and putting into stacks of (10)…100 copper pennies.

Percentages 101


How do you get that . There is only 100 in percent.

How do you get that

with diligence and hard work…

just cleared 114.687


From the time that I was a child around the age of 9 or 10, my father showed me the how and the why and the purpose of selling lemonade in the summer, cutting grass, selling fireworks on the 4th of July.

It stayed with me for life. I believe if you raise the child in the way that they shall go they will make no matter what. It starts at an early age.

After high school graduation he asked me what I wanted to do, and I did it. I went into the military and made a life for myself. Got out and them BAMMM!

A new love. Real Estate.