Removing an Ex from the property deed

I own a property with my ex-girlfriend and I want to refinance in my name only. How would I go about doing this? Would I have to actually sell the house to myself or is there a way to remove a name off a deed? I live in New Jersey.

Technically she is a part owner. She needs to sign some form of a deed to transfer title to you. Call it a sale if you like. She needs to agree to the transfer or you need to go to court and prove the court should give you title without her.

If you listen to Dave Ramsey. He said:

Dear Dave,
I’m looking at a $92,000 home I really love. I have a car payment, but my boyfriend and I have a combined income of about $53,000. Should we wait until the car is paid off to buy the home?

Dear Carrie,
Don’t do it! You should never buy a home with a boyfriend or girlfriend, or even right after you get married. If you go through with this, it could end up being the worst mistake of your life.
Have you ever heard of Murphy’s Law, and how everything that CAN go wrong WILL go wrong? You might as well give Murphy his own bedroom if you do this, Carrie, because you’ll be creating a huge nightmare for yourselves morally, legally, physically, financially and spiritually.
Slow down and take your time. Make sure you two love each other and want to spend the rest of your lives with each other. Then, after you’ve gotten married, live in a cheap apartment for a few years while you get the car paid off and save up for a solid 20 percent down payment on a house. When you’ve done all this, THEN you can start looking for that first home together.

  • Dave

I have been re-reading Dave Ramsey’s “Total Money Makeover”. Great book, so simple that I didn’t want to do it, but he is right.

You new real estate investors…that should be the first book you get from the library or buy. I’m sure there must be an audio book too.

Step One is to get your personal finances in order. You are your own best asset. Or your own worst enemy.


Thanks for the pointer to the book. I am going to take a look.

Definitely the property is co-owned with her.
The best is learn fro the mistake and not to repeat it next time.
I think i will also have a look at the book.

You can definitely refi just under your name and remove your ex from the deed. First get an idea of how much the property is worth to make sure its not upside down (your current mortgage is higher that its fair market value).

Then contact your ex and explain you want to refi. Be prepared just in case she wants money to be removed from the deed and if you’re willing to pay her off. (Optional: Tell her if you don’t refi to a lower rate there is a chance of defaulting on the mortgage which will ruin both of your credits.)

If she agrees with the refi, your mortgage lender will prepare everything at loan closing. There will be a new deed prepared and new loan documents with only your name on it. If you promise her some money, you give that to her at closing. Done.

Wow, I have run into so many people that made this mistake of joint ownership with girlfriend/boyfriend or wife. A messy situation. Especially if there is bad blood in the mix. :banghead

Good luck with that.