To Old to Rock an Roll.
My long lost buddy Jim found me on Face Book. He came over my place and we smoked a bowl of his stuff. He told me he was restoring an old vehicle for a classic car enthusiast and was getting $25 an hour. I told him how I had been wholesaling houses and never left the house.
He told me had been sanding and doing body work and replacing rusty panels for weeks and was glad to escape for awhile.
Jim says he’s 63 yrs old and I told him I was 67.
He then looked concerned and in his stoned state, asked wat was I going to do when I got too old to do real estate?
I told him, ur never too old to do real estate, in fact you cud do real estate the day b4 you die or maybe the morning of.
We broke into hysterical laughter.
But yea, instead of doing nothing we can be wholesaling real estate till the cows come home,
I got a call from an old guy wanting to cash out his 4 rentals. He’s owned them since the flood and are all free and clear.
These houses are built in the 40’s, two of them are 2/1’s and two are 1/1’s and one has a garage apartment that’s not permitted.
Sellers name is Tony and he says he wants 400K which is about full value, but these houses have never been upgraded, I’m talking original wood slide up windows and old kitchens and bathrooms. Tony tells me they are all rented and he has a nice income from them.
I’m thinking even at 400K these have a potential rental income of 800 a month each and $400 for the garage apartment, there is some nice cash flow there. Now to give Tony my kick in the nuts price and see what happens.
My latest bird dog ad is this,
Property Acquisition Manager
My Partners and I flip houses here in Fresno/Clovis/ Madera/Hanford and all the surrounding towns.
We have done a lot of deals. We specialize in older fixers. As you can imagine it can be profitable, but if you think it’s easy and you want it sugar coated, keep looking.
If you have a car, phone and Internet, you’re loaded for bear. No license required.
We pay a flat rate of $2,000 Cash for each address that you submit that we can do a deal on.
Email for my Free Info Pack
I’ve got about a dozen responses so far, cuz the masses dont start stirring till the sun comes out
However, This is probably what wud motivate the average bird dog.
Get paid for doing nothing.
Sleep in late, don’t do anything and get paid. Real Estate Investor Rando will pay you to stay home and do nothing, Watch TV, eat junk food and smoke pot all day and get a big check for doing absolutely nothing.
Only requirement is that you be breathing and have no ambition. Are you living in your parents basement, worried about your most recent DUI? Well cheer up lowly human, cuz this is ur lucky day. I pay $200 a day for you to sit on ur ass and do nothing…
Call Rando and get ready to get paid for doing nothing.
Wud they respond to this?
They stole the floor. OK, now I’ve seen it all. I’m getting a 4 Plex on contract for 50K, my bird dog Rich found it in his small nearby town. It looks nice from the outside, large 2 story apartment building w parking on a quiet street w big trees.
It’s when you go inside, it’s like u were slapped in the head with a termite infested 2/4. The second floor is gone. I’m talking old oak T&G 1" thick hard wood flooring is friking gone. At least the floor joists are still there.
It’s got graffiti, gutted to the studs w wiring and plumbing missing, rotting balconies. And you know what? I luv it.
Already generating some interest at 67K, Rich and I have done a bunch of deals and he likes 50%, and I like it also, especially when he drops it in my lap, all I do is send out txts and emails and my buyers are slobbering already.
Now the problem arises when they realize it’s gona cost 150-200k in rehab, I estimate this building cud be worth 300-360 after repairs. This is fun.
It’s the game we play. We had a verbal confirmation w seller that our offer of 50K was acceptable, I had this bad boy sold this morning for 64K I put the pressure on Rich my finder to get this mo fo signed, well first the seller was gone for the weekend, then Monday wudnt return calls. now this morning my partner finally gets into his office to get purchase contract signed, and wudnt you know it, seller says he decided not to sell.
He was playing us. My buyer is not happy.
But the high I get from finding the buyer and negotiating and everything is amazing, I’ve never experienced anything like it doing anything else. I was really having fun.
Even the final outcome of getting kicked in the gonads and feelings of disappointment can be fun. Gotta add some humor and a good attitude.
Just start the game over. Reboot, It’s going to be a great year.
My wanabe partner and bird dog Enrique just emailed me, he’s the one that rented office space. I sent him back an email telling him to order bandit signs and heavy white card stock at Amazon and we’ll have Office Depot cut them to size and then to place an ad on Craig’s List for bird dogs and I gave him a photo copy of the bandit signs I purchased last time and told him to go to dirtcheapsigns.com and I included a copy of the CL ad I use and told him to order the sh-t.
He emails back and says he will look into it. Crap, another time wasting dude that’s not taking action.
Then tells me if we meet he will buy what we need. I told him to do as instructed, order the stuff and then contact me.
If this guy gets in gear I’ll wear a pink bonnet and diaper and dance on main street.
My right hand was itching lately and that always means money is coming, but dam, I didnt know how, cuz I had nothing cooking. So later I’m just sitting there on my sofa watching my fav show, Judge Judy, when another investor calls and says he needs my help selling a mobile home in Bakersfield.
I wasn’t to excited cuz It didnt seem like such a killer deal, it was just a single wide, but it sat on it’s own lot on a permanent foundation, had shade trees, paved driveway and in a nice neighborhood. It was also rented to a long term tenant for 600 buks and my investor buddy only wanted 45K. I asked for 38 and we settled on 41k, I got his signature on my little purchase contract and then.
I sent it out to every investor I know, but crap, nobody wanted it at 48K Going down in flames.
And it’s 100 miles from my city, & I got no photos.
Did I give up? hell no, I wrote up an enticing ad, in Bakersfield and Tulare and Visalia, mentioning all the good points and how it wud be perfect for a landlord investor and it had cash flow & yada yada.
I snapped a few photos with my cell phone on google maps.
Lo an Behold, I get the call, a Mexican guy and wife from Santa Maria want it, and then I got another call and I had just put in Craig’s list a few hrs ago.
And the insane part? it’s so &^%$) easy, a nut less monkey could do it.
If it plays out, 7 Grand for doing frikin nothing. And then there’s the fun factor, I’m spewing all over myself here.
Let’s make some Money…
It’s interesting how slow the winter months can be and then wen sun comes out, I start getting the calls.
Just got a call from a desperate seller has house in the old Mayfair district, she let son stay there and he hasn’t made any rent payments for several years and shes also paying his gas and power and water and trash. she says she’s been paying $1,500 a month including the mortgage.
She owes 98K and the houses is worth about 160-180 after repairs and updating. I’ll offer her 108, give her 10K walking money, my partner that found it and I, can split 6 grand each and our buyer can deal with eviction and repairs, wham bam.
But it gets even more interesting. Elizabeth the seller says her son is hostile and wont allow her inside. She says wen she went by and looked in the windows she noticed an extension cord going to neighbors and she wondered why the power bill has been so high, especially for a single guy in a 2/1 house. Elizabeth says she is getting married and does not want to carry this baggage with her, can you picture this, a 34 year old dead beat son, expenses up the yang, this debt and problems and all this to her new life? She tells me she just wants to get rid of it. You can imagine how I’m drooling over here.
Do I offer to pay only the mortgage balance? Which there is a good chance she wud accept. Or do I offer her that carrot on the stick with walking away cash? My partner Steve that found it is a newbie and letting me do whatever I think I can get away with.
I asked her, wud you really kick ur son out? She says yes, it’s time and I prayed to god for guidance. In my years of observing humans, I’ve discovered we can justify anything. But how can this low life form son justify never paying rent or utilities and then sending a power cord to the neighbors? Has to be some drug activity.
I’m not here to steal this ladies property, I’m here to help her. At least thats my justification.
I sent out a teaser to my buyer Tom with some of the details. Wen he calls he wants to know when he can get in to view it.
I tell him because of the hostile tenant we prob wont be able to inspect it,
He then says, so let me get this straight, I wud have to buy it as is with no inspection and have to deal with evicting the expletive out of there and pay closing costs?
At that point I cudnt help but start laughing and meekly say, yea.
After a few seconds of silence he tells me his buddy wud take it for 135 and we can all make some money.
I tell him I’m just beginning negotiations and am gonna try to put this together. I told him to hang tight.
I get on such a high on this stuff, I can’t even take a nap.
I like to let these deals sit overnight so not to appear to desperate. So this morning I txt Elizabeth that we can pay 110K We will pay for all repairs and updating and pay all closing costs and also will take care of eviction if needed. So Elizabeth txted back that sounded good and it will be a blessing if we took care of the eviction. Then she asked what she needed to do now.
I told her that I will email her the purchase agreement and to Print it, Sign it , then Scan and email it back to me. I will start escrow and in a few weeks the escrow will have her come in to sign the papers and get paid.
My buyer Tom says he can get 135K for it but wants a third of the profits. So at a 25K profit split 3 ways, Holy real estate gods, that’s over 8 Grand each. Or I cud see if my main buyer Matt will take it for 135 and Steve and I can split the 25K 12,500 each. I really excited and drooling all over myself. I’ll get my purchase contract signed today and then let the fun begin.
I just got the purchase contract back signed by my seller. Now were getting serious. My buyer Tom called and he was more excited than me, he was gona call his buyer and get back to me and its been a few hours and I’m a little worried.
I zoomed in on the google street view to snap a photo and counted 5 dogs in the yard and 2 more at the front gate wanting in. It looks like the garage has been converted to a 3rd bedroom and has a huge covered patio that might be enclosed, it’s a tweakers paradise.
With this signed contract I can begin some outrageous ads on Craig’s List with titles that will soil the drawers of every investor that sees it. Landlord Special, Distressed Seller, Hostile son tenant, Need a quick Sale, Fixer at 60% of value and yada yada.
I need a nap but I’m salivating all over my self.
My buyers Tom and his buddy say they still want the property at 135K but it’s been 2 days nothing is happening. Tom tells me his buddy wont buy it unless he can get inside. I suggested he show up with 50 buks cash and this deadbeat will probably let them in. He asks if I want to do that, I laugh and say, no I dont.
I got a few ads started on Craig’s List and have 1 offer of 115K He’s our back up guy if nobody else wants it, then I will go back to Elizabeth our seller and explain or lie my ass off, that my cash lender is not going to lend us the 110, he’s at 99K, if she agrees then we can make 7,500 each.
Worst case is she says no way & we can still make 2,500 each and who wud complain about that? But then, it’s only been 2 days on contract and we got 45 days.
I see dollars flying out the window, but it’s still fun.
I explained to my partner Steve that we can sell now for 115 which will give us 2,500 and if he thinks we shud take the money and run. Steve emailed me back that he wud be OK with 2,500. I emailed him back that I wud cut him 2 Grand today and he cud sign off and then I wud go back to seller and get that 10K reduction in price and deal with the risk of losing it all.
Steve replied, hell no, see if u can get seller down on price.
It’s interesting, if we both get 2,500 he’s ok with it, but if I get more… haha
I tried getting our buyer to go up to 118 he’s stuck at 115K
Now I’m a bit scared to approach Elizabeth our seller w the bad news, and somehow word it so I’m not completely fabricating a bogus story.
Here is what I’m thinking.
Elizabeth, we are having trouble getting this deal done. My partner will go forward with purchase and take the risk if we can get the property for 99K Sorry bout this, it’s difficult and risky without an inspection. Randy
Here is closer to the truth. Elizabeth, we got ur property sold but my partner and I are only making 2,500 each and we wud much rather make 8 Grand each, can you lower your price to 99K? and we can better line our pockets from ur distressed situation?
Oh those pesky feelings of guilt, but the lady is spending 1,500 a month to support this deadbeat son and I’m helping her be debt free, and start a new life, yea that’s the ticket, there’s my justification.
Oh man, it just might happen. I txted seller that I was sorry but I was having trouble doing this deal, and my partner says we need this price at 99K and we can move forward and start escrow. She txted back that it was OK. So I emailed her the new contract to sign. Waiting on that. Notice how I put the blame on him.
I txted my buyer Jason this morning that it was bout ready to fly. Now he txted and wants to talk about the tenant. He’s not having second thoughts I hope. Yesterday he wanted to go knock on the door and I told him to hang tight. He just called and said he was going to buy it with somebody else, which prob means he’s gona wholesale my wholesale deal. He also tells me he’s gona go over there and feel the guy out. He asked if the guy knew his Mom was selling the prop out from under him? I told him I don’t think so, cuz it was just a week ago that she prayed and typed in sell my house now and our site came up.
My partner Steve that found it says to go for broke. I am really excited to get him his first deal. He’s got a website and that must of cost. Steve has a negative wife. This is going to be his “Shut the Blank up check”.
Now to coordinate all this and keep it afloat, it is stressful, and exciting.
This morning the crap hits the fan. I knew with this deal it was an emotional attachment, and this god fearing woman kicken her allegedly drug addict son out on the street, cud be a problem.
And then everything was going good till I asked for a 10K reduction in price. Now she says she dont want to sell. I reminded her that we have a signed contract when she called, oh crap, she was going to consult with her fiancé who knows a paralegal or has a cousin that knows how to spell attorney.
I’m feeling down, our buyer Jason says she has to sell to us and he’s forwarding the purchase contract to his attorney to review.
I knew it cud happen, I took the risk and now I’m digging a hole to camp out in.
But, I’m still laughing.
Time to find some more deals.
My buyer sent the contract for his attorney to review. and I sent this message to our seller Elizabeth, she likes to be called Lisa.
Lisa, my partner submitted the purchase contract to our attorney. He states we hav a valid enforceable contract and we intend to complete. He states if u refuse to sell ur liable for breach of contract and we will place a lien on title, and you will face a lawsuit court costs and our damages.
She replied that she signed the contract for 110, I fired back, yea and that’s what were going for.
Maybe she was confused wen I was asking for a reduction in price, or who knows the mind of this female humanoid.
My buyer Jason is asking for the assignment for 5K and the signed purchase contract. He will start escrow tomorrow.
Not sure if its gona happen, but it’s still fun.
2 local investors asked me to find them some buyers for 3 properties. I believe that means, we got these overpriced properties that we can’t sell and if anybody can sell used toe jam it’s you.
I’ve been marketing them on Craig’s List with little results. I got these investors to lower the price slightly and now getting some responses.
One of the houses is boarded up and looks really bad, I got the price down to 51K and another investor/wholesaler says he has a buyer at 55, I told him to do it and we can split 4 grand, he’s going over to look at it today with his buyer. He just called and said he cudnt do it.
Another buyer says when he went by the property was infested with vagrants, they had 2 trailers in the back and a campfire where they are keeping warm and cooking who knows what. He tells me his buyer a lady refused to get out of the car and he offered 30K
I want some better deals than these.
One of my long lost bird dogs that I had paid out 2K in cash to emails me, Havn’t heard from her in a few yrs, she tells me she’s moved to this real estate hotspot in or near frikin San Antonio Texas.
She claims huge expanses of distressed housing. Maybe she is used to these California neighborhoods where we have sidewalks and flood control basins and manicured yards. She thinks a normal TX house is distressed when its just some good ol boys getting ready to go pig hunting and living the life. Or maybe it’s time to flip some out of state fixers.
She sends me 60 distressed addresses and holy real estate gods, my local Title company does them all and I got property reports like you wudnt believe, everything except the owners blood type, disposition and dental records.
I get excited when opportunity comes at me from dif directions. I’ve done 3 profitable out of state deals, w shared profits, I want more.
I got post cards cranking out, I use a handwriting font that wudnt fool your blind Grandma.
But, it might get the attention of a few distressed Texans.
If there are distressed neighborhoods in your city, all I need are the addresses, I’ll flip them with you an share profits.
Let’s make some Money…