Having a joint account with your spouse and i have a car payment and her car payment has my name on it. The money coming out her account to pay for the can that debt come off my debt ratio if she can show for 12 month that she making that payment.
Since your married your debt to income ratio will always be inclusive of you and your wives debt. If it shows on your credit report it is a debt, your car lender will never agree to remove your name from the loan and a mortgage lender will never rescore to calculate debt without the car since your on the loan.
You need to work to pay off debt and to improve your income by what ever means is reasonable.
It will take a little time but is very doable, in the mean time work to wholesale property, two wholesale properties for $12k ($6k each) will swing that debt ratio around nicely, so go get it done!