I been wondering, if I was successful wud I have the time or desire to frequent REIClub and other investor sites?
Would I be off vacationing & enjoying my toys and busy putting together deals?
Sometimes I feel successful other times I feel like a failure. I’ve done close to 50 wholesale deals but I’m so far from where I want to be.
Maybe if I got to where I want to be with the big house w pool & etc. I still wudnt be satisfied.
Maybe that’s just the way humans are wired. Never happy, always searching, always trying to accumulate more stuff.
Of course I tell myself I’m happy, but I cud be much happier. Maybe if I get everything I want I cud lay back and veg and rot.
We strive for happiness, but can we really ever be happy"?
Food for thought.
Rando
I can’t define ‘success’ for you, but you’ve certainly experienced success.
Your question is a good one. One that few people ask themselves, much less of others.
It seems there’s always gonna be someone who’s done more, made more, and otherwise accomplished more than any of us will, or could. The point is to be our best, not someone else’s.
It’s important to have a purpose that transcends oneself. Doing things just for yourself, gets old, and isn’t really satisfying in the long run. Whether what we do is for family or for God, long term satisfaction comes by serving others.
The problem comes when we try to take the easy route, and just please ourselves. That’s a lonely road.
The main reason I contribute here is, because I receive value in helping others better understand real estate investing. Frankly, it helps clear my mind and focus on something outside myself. It’s like a mini vacation.
Anyway, that’s my take.
Keep at it.
Great question. Here’s what I’ve learned over many years.
I can tell you without a doubt that once you reach a certain point, adding more dollars to the pile doesn’t make you any happier. BUT…Reaching a point where you don’t need anymore is amazing. Your life becomes less stressed, you have your financial sh*t together, no mortgage, no debt or good debt, assets that pay you to own them, and opportunities that seem to come from everywhere.
This will sound crazy to you now. But once you get to that point you will look back and realize the CLIMB was the best part. The climb sucks while you’re climbing. It’s stressful, exhausting, and not a lot of fun. But humans tend to forget the bad and remember the good. It’s about accomplishing something that most people can’t. It builds confidence.
But the best part???
The cherry on top???
It’s being able to take that knowledge and pass it to your family and friends and change their lives. No car, no house, no property, no deal, has ever given me the sheer joy of seeing someone you care about finally “GETTING IT!!!”
Everything in their life has taught them this can’t happen, it’s not that easy. Or my personal favorite!!!
“IF IT WAS THAT EASY EVERYONE WOULD BE DOING IT.”
In my opinion, that is the single worst quote in human history. It keeps people from TRYING!!!
Keep doing what you’re doing. SAVE YOUR PROFITS!!! Let them build. Live simply and don’t spend money on stupid sh*t. You’ll be able to buy all the cars, boats, and toys you want in a few years. The game is to BUILD YOUR FOUNDATION!!!
The stronger your base, the more chances you can take, the more opportunity comes your way, the more money you make. It FEEDS on itself.
The first million is a b@llbreaker. The next million seems like it floated down from a cloud. The next, you forget how and when you break that threshold. From there, unless you’re living like a jerk off, it just doesn’t matter.
Most people live in 1200 sq. ft. regardless of the size of their house. You can have 10,000 sq ft. But you’ll USE 1200.
If it makes you happy to pay for an extra 8800 sq ft of property that you won’t use. GO FOR IT…If having a $300,000 Bentley floats your boat? Go for it. But look at how much those turds depreciate before you buy one. $300,000 in 2010 is now $50K…Screw that bro. Take that cabbage and buy PROPERTY that pays YOU and increases in value.
THINGS get boring very fast. People you help, pay dividends for LIFE!!!
That’s some great financial advice. But are you happy?
Some years ago I decided I wasn’t happy and I thought about just going to a tropical island, building a shack on the beach. But then I thought, wat will I do, eat fish and be dirt poor, will that make me happy?
It’s interesting cuz I did go to a tropical island, it’s called Bohol. I married a pretty young island girl and I wud spend 4 to 6 months there every year and wud come back to California to work and earn money to build us a big beautiful home. We got 4 kids and its been the most fun and rewarding and happiness creating thing I’ve ever done.
I keep searching for meaning and happiness though, doing research, books and etc. But I believe I’ve discovered how to be Happy.
It’s so simple and profound.
Decide to be happy… don’t laugh, our minds can produce any feelings with just thought, We can decide to be wealthy and healthy and happy.
The tricky part is believing and taking action.
Yes, I am extremely happy!!!
I lead an interesting life! I can afford to buy whatever I want. But I don’t blow my money on Ferrari’s or Yacht’s. If you like that stuff and have the money, buy as many as you want. Nothing wrong with that. But, I learned a long time ago that buying THINGS makes you happy for a very short period of time. DOING THINGS makes you happy for long periods of time. I see that you’re listing your greatest accomplishments as your family. YOU ARE A RICH AND WISE MAN MY FRIEND!!!
The money will keep coming your way. Don’t worry about how quick the chips stack. Just stack 'em. Enjoy your family, help your friends, offer opportunity to others and they’ll bring you more opportunity than you can deal with. It all sounds like bullish*t…
IT’S NOT…It’s very real and very satisfying.
I’ll make you…H A P P Y
Interesting topic that is often the subject of conversations with my friends. I can’t tell you how many times a friend would approach me about how I should live my life. You should enjoy it more, you should take more vacations,you should not go to bed so early or wake up so early,have a drink etc. What makes me happy is having the respect of my peers and constantly honing my skills to eventually become one of the best CRE Originators in my industry.
These same people who live for life experiences truly make me sick to be honest. They are on the Ferris wheel of life, never making enough ,never saving enough,never applying themselves enough. And all the while trying to pick apart those with extreme discipline. My mentor told me the greatest line I live by. He said there are two kinds of pain , choose one. The pain of discipline or the pain of regret .
At 47 years old I never thought in million years I would achieve what I have and I’m only getting warmed up. Am I happy? , more than I can say. Blessed,Thankful and so disciplined I make a monk look undisciplined.
Healthy,a blessed and thankful view of my life,fit as a fiddle and constantly learning . I listen way more than I speak and I love to learn.
I said this 8 years ago on this very forum with my past argument with Mike Property Manager, it can be found if you dont believe me . I would rather be doing nothing else than my craft. I LOVE what I do . I’m a certified deal junkie and thankful. Blessed.
I learn from all of you , especially my buddy FDjake. Good man who I learned alot from . This forum has many smart,savvy investors to learn from. I learn from all of you. Stay humble,healthy and hungry. Eyes and Ears open,mouth shut
The action is the juice for me. Not the stuff I can buy.
I once seen an interview w Paul McCartney, the interviewer asked him, what is the one question u hope ur never asked?
He says “Are you happy” He jokingly said it in a half crying manner. But I cud see some real pain there. He is worth millions, a top entertainer, wrestling with the elusive happiness.
I was over a friends house many yrs ago and there was a young retarded girl that lived across the street, we wud often see her coming home from her special school always skipping and singing and smiling. I never took much notice, but my buddies Mom was smiling & watching her one day and says, Wouldn’t it be nice to be that happy with out a care in the world?
So I’ve concluded that there is many dif degrees of happiness, but to be 100% happy you have to be out of ur mind.
My friend Arnie summed up his life, he told me he is miserable with a woman and miserable without.
I promised my wife 19 yrs ago that I wud make her happy, that is a promise I cudnt keep, that woman, well, I cud go on and on.
I’m working my way up the happiness ladder,
I’m most happy it seems, when my mind is occupied with my hobbies.
That is hilarious!!
I was reading a small article about the late JP Getty. Really sad, a billionaire, and to lead such a miserable life. Someone that knew him stated he always looked like he was attending his own funeral.
Who wud want to live that life?
I have a book called Lifetime Conversation Guide. I was sort of tricked into to buying it many years ago because it advertised mind control over people. It is mind control though, but more subtle. Using methods for controlling family, sales, friendships, business etc with conversation skills, mainly listening skills. He claims the highest compliment you can give somebody is to intently listen to them and to be empathetic and that every person is important to your happiness and success.
The author states, to be happy it all boils down to one thing… Don’t try to change anybody, cuz u will fail and cause resentment and aggravation and on and on. He says to accept people exactly as they are, if they are odd and weird, let them be, and rejoice in their uniqueness.
I give you this info free of charge, the book cost me $16 which was a lot back when I purchased it 35 yrs ago.
Don’t tell me you wouldn’t have traded your life for his in a heartbeat if it was offered. In 1957, didn’t Time Magazine name him the richest American in the world? The guy was married 5 times. He had a sex life like JFK in his 80s with models and mistresses still lining up to be with him. He was still potent with a pre-viagra drug called H3. He wasn’t like Stephen Hawking; he could still use his arms and legs. He had children. He owned castles, villas, etc. His hobby was flipping million dollar antiques and artwork daily. He had everything.
You think he had a miserable life? Where are you from? Mars? That guy lived his life to the fullest. Just because he doesn’t wear a smile on his face all the time, doesn’t mean he’s miserable.
You bought the book 35 years ago and it taught you how to control your family with conversation skills and how important every person is to your happiness and success and you still couldn’t save your marriage with it’s sage advice. Well, it doesn’t sound like the book’s advice is worth the 2 cents of paper it’s written on.
This Billionaire’s grand son was kidnapped and he refused to pay the ransom. Until the kidnapper cut off the kids ear and mailed it to him, then this ahole paid the ransom but made his grandson sign a loan document that he wud pay back the ransom money to him.
Is this guy really your hero?
A man with 5 wives knows how to treat a woman? Yea right, like a piece of meat. I def wudnt trade my life for his.
fdjake?
the most self actualized person…I’ve ever known!
thanks for everything bud!
-Mike
I would trade in five or six wives if it meant being the richest man in the world. Wives are a dime-a-dozen …and so are girlfriends. Now, prostitutes …are probably a tad more expensive.
As far as the ransom is concerned, I’d ask, "Three million? For a drug-abusing ne’erdowell? Yeah, well, I might consider taking him back, if you gave me $150,000 toward his rehab costs. Otherwise, I’ll just frame this ear you sent me, and let it remind me of the money I saved not bailing out one of the 17 grand-kids that are pot-and-heroin-abusing layabouts.
Or not.
Dam, these mornings are awesome, I get up at 7 and have a few cups and go out and enjoy the back yard, put on a little music an smoke a little bud, cook up som incredible lunch w fresh veggies, do a little real estate and water the garden, really nice, but I got this yearning for more, bigger and better, quiet desperation.
Its a mental conflict, do I settle into the mundane? Shud I be out there knocking on doors, ordering more bandit signs, recruiting more bird dogs, and getting the hell off my ass?
What wud make me happiest? Am I happy enuf?
I truly believe you decide to be happy. Some people are happy with way less than what average people own and some rich people are just sad. Of course, there are circumstances where it must be very difficult to feel happy, but mostly it’s our mindset if we feel happy or not.
In my opinion, you can be truly happy if you are contented. :cool :cool
I think that you can learn to be happy … most of us will say that happiness is very close related to how much money you make … but in the end I think that it’s more than that.
you can never truly define success and happines hence for many people your experience would be true happiness while you can be left unsatisfied. it’s really hard to be truly happy, mainly because most of the time, people have no idea what happiness is to them.