OK, I’m a bit over my goal amount but here are the promised Life Rules…you will probably recognize some of these – I have borrowed heavily from those that have made sense to me!
HASTEDT’S LIFE RULES
- Treat everyone as you would expect them to treat you if the roles were reversed
- If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody gonna be happy
- An optimist sees the glass as half-full; the pessimist sees the glass as half-empty – I’m a realist – I see a glass twice as big as it needs to be!
- If you don’t pay your bills, they take your stuff
- If it smells bad, don’t eat it
5.1 Liver smells bad
5.2 If it’s already green don’t eat it - Never make the same mistake twice…learn from your mistakes
- Life is hard but it’s harder if you’re stupid
- If you can’t stand the answer, don’t ask the question
- The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the @$$hole.
9.1 If you walk into a Starbucks and order a “decaf grande, half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n’-Low, and one NutraSweet,” ooh, you’re a huge @$$hole - Never start building a house on Friday.
- If I was as stupid as I look, nature would have weeded me out by now
- To be successful, work half a day – pick the first 12 hours or the second.
- The saddest thing that can happen to a person is that he live all Winter and die in the Spring.
- Paint hides a multitude of sins
- Life is not fair; get used to it – and get over it
- If you ever hope to be a credible adult and want a job that pays better than minimum wage, then for God’s sake don’t pierce or tattoo every available piece of flesh.
- The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
- Never drive yourself into anything that you can’t back out of
- Don’t eat anything that’s served to you out a window unless you’re a seagull.
- You will NOT make $40,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice president with a Treo/Motorola Q until you earn both.
- Take RESPONSIBILITY for YOUR actions
21.1 If you screw up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your mistakes. Learn from them. - Schools may have done away with winners and losers but life has not.
- Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
- Practice doesn’t make perfect – perfect practice makes perfect
- As a kid, my father was the stupidest SOB on the planet – the older I got, the smarter he got
- It is what it is…what is done is done – adjust to it and move on
- Know what matters and what doesn’t – in the big scheme of things, the chances are that it doesn’t
- Do something good everyday
- Only dead fish swim always with the stream
- God gave you two ears and one mouth – they should be used in the same proportion
- LIfe doesn’t come with an instruction manual – if you’re a guy, you wouldn’t have read it anyway
- Only two things fall out of the sky – birdcrap and fools
- Where I’m from, “Alcohol, Tobacco, and firearms” is a convenience store, not a government agency
- Gather the facts, plan a course of attack, and execute
- You cannot help a person permanently by doing for them what they could and should be doing for themselves
- Trust everyone and no one…
- My word is my bond…if I tell you I’ll do something, I will
- What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need; what you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.
- Trust your “gut”
- You learn the most when things go wrong.
Keith